This has been a hard blog to write, as I am a ‘very tightly wrapped parcel’. Some would say I’m strong. I am not. Inside my soul my walls are cracked, I just have very good rendering on the outside to hide it.
My lifeline is Maggie, she saved me from drowning (metaphorically), she showed me the right path when I was lost.
We have always had a dog, dogs or dogs and cats. All sorts of breeds and mixed breeds (mongrels, they were called in my day.) Our last dog, however, was very much my husbands dog. A great big, soft Rottweiler, sitting at nine stone of muscle. The most gentle dog you could ever meet. He was Pig cats best friend, they would sleep, eat, walk and play together. When Diesel left us, he left a huge hole in our hearts but especially Pig cats and my husband’s. So much so my husband could not bear to think of getting another dog. So we stayed a cat only family.
Later the same year though my mum was very suddenly stolen away from us. One day she was there, the next day she was not. It devastated our whole family. Leaving me and my sisters stricken with grief and lost. The next few days, weeks and months passed very much the same, as we all tried to come to terms with this horrific event. Not only did we have our own grief to overcome but our children’s too. Our Mum did not make it to retirement age. She left behind myself, and my sisters (all in our thirties) in shock.
My husband and myself tried very hard to step into the boots, that were and will always be unfillable. The only consolation she is not in heaven alone, she is with our brother.
My mum had always, loved and admired a little Westie who lived a few doors down from her named Aggie. She would often say that the first thing she was going to do when she retired was to get a West Highland Terrier because she loved their characters.
Strangely enough a friend of a friend of a friend had not long had a litter of puppies. She had one pup left. A girl. The runt that hadn’t been chosen as her ear and tail were duff (they didn’t go up) and did I want her?
So the husband came home from work and…
We had Maggie. Now on looking back, Maggie was probably a puppy farm puppy. She was in quite poor condition,with a distended tummy, very lethargic and not Interested in much at all. I know we were very lucky to be able to care her back to good health, as we have heard many a horror story of pups being so poorly, they have been lost.
So lifeline, I do not know where to begin on what Maggie has brought to me. I cannot find the words. She brought me light. Love, unconditional acceptance. She brought me back. I needed her more than I knew. She will never bring my mum back but she is a part of mine and my mum’s story.
Maggie was our first westie. I will NEVER go back. West Highland Terriers are my soul animal.
I promise to always try and be better, to be kinder and love Maggie as she loves me, whole and unconditionally.
Maggie saved my life and now we have three.