You Will Never Bathe Alone…

Mr 3WD&P must have missed point 2:4:A in the contracted terms and conditions of owning a West Highland Terrier. You know the contractual point I am on about – the one where you will never get your own personal space or ever go to the toilet again alone. As such I am not giving him any sympathy as he grumps his gums about the dogs walking over his face in bed to get where they want to sleep or the fact he cannot shut the door anymore when having a bath.

Neither am I giving him any sympathy on not being able to breath as Willie tries to get as close to daddy as possible (on his face in this case) as does he not know this is totally acceptable in westie world. Why would he need to breath anyway, Willie is warming his face with his whole body, breathing may thwart this process.

Furthermore how ridiculous is it to really think that you can sit on the couch and watch TV or god forbid socialize with fellow two legged companions without the four legged ones squashing in the middle and separating you by force of the furthest they can stretch. Or even that you would be allowed to eat – on your knee – on the couch, in peace, without the heat of thier duck and fish breath heaving upon you or the slight bit of drool hitting your trouser leg as you are pitifully judged as being the worst dog parents in the world for a) not plating them up thier own plate and b) not giving them your own actual dinner.

Moral of the story Mr 3WD&P – read all the terms and conditions – especially the ones in the small print. You do not own a westie, they own you – you are actually just the staff 🤣…

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