Car Monster…

Willie: Mam…

Mam: What is it Willie?

Willie: She’s touching me!

Mam: Whose touching you?

Willie: Ginny is touching me!

Mam: No she’s not Willie, Ginny is in her own car seat strapped in. She can’t touch you.

Willie: Mam she’s doing it again, she’s touching me, I don’t want her touching me!

Mam: For goodness sake Willie, she’s not touching you.

Willie: LOOK, LOOK. MAAAMMM, SHES TOUCHING ME NOW!

Mam: Don’t you dare make me pull this car over Willie (quickly checks on Ginny.) She’s not touching you. She is just resting her head on your car seat.

Willie: Well that’s like the same thing. It’s my car seat and she’s touching it, so it’s like she’s touching me.

Mam: Seriously Willie son, she just loves you and wants to be near you, stop being horrid!

Willie: turns his back to Ginny and snorts in disgust.

Willie : MAAAMMM, SHE’S BREATHING ON ME.

Mam: Oh for goodness sake Willie, she’s not breathing on you or touching you OR even looking at you. Ignore her and look out of the window.

Willie : it’s not fair, you always take her side – I hate you.

Mam: Don’t you make me get out of this car Willie or else. Just move away from her.

Willie: I don’t want too. I was here first.

Mam: Seriously Willie, you are like six years old. That’s like forty two in people years, Ginny is not even one, less than three a half in people years. Be the adult.

Willie: Why can’t Maggie have her? There’s loads of space on her side. I wanna sit in the front, she’s still touching me!

Mam: Right that’s it I’m ringing daddy…

Willie: Silence.

Mam: rolls her eyes.

Willie: Snorts, turns his back on Mam and squashes his face up against the car window in a huff while Ginny: Stares off into space no idea what’s just gone on and Maggie: Continues to snore while sleeping upside down.

And they say kids are a nightmare travelling in the car…

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